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Women Share Unique, Divine Influence

Mike Foley | University Relations | 20 November 2008

Two prominent Latter-day Saint leaders spoke from experience in addressing attendees at Brigham Young University Hawaii's International Business Conference on November 14 about the divine gift of influence women have and its unique power in shaping relationships.

Sister Sheri Dew [pictured at left] — President & CEO of Deseret Book Company, a former counselor in the Relief Society General Presidency and a best-selling author — and Sister Wendy Watson Nelson [pictured below at right] — wife of Elder Russell M. Nelson of the Twelve and a former BYU professor of marriage and family therapy who chaired the BYU Women's Conference — used pictures and stories from their worldwide travels to illustrate the impact women can have developing leadership among their families and associates.

Sister Sheri Dew

"When we talk about the influence of women, there's not anything that I'm going to say that should be exclusive to women," Sister Dew started out. She also noted that Church President Thomas S. Monson has noted, "It's not possible not to have influence. The question is, what kind are we going to have."

"Women are the leaders of leaders," she said. "What could possibly be more significant than bearing a child and helping raise that boy or that girl so that they are equipped with what they need to have to make the decisions that will keep them on the path back to our Heavenly Father and eventual exaltation."

"The Church, in fact, provides very unique training for us. We start learning how to do things when we're in Primary: We start learning how to stand in front of a group and give a message. We learn how to speak in public, pray in public and how to lead, organize, rally, motivate and encourage, whether it's one-on-one in a small class somewhere or in a larger setting."

"The kind of training we receive, I can't find any organization on the planet where as many women have on-the-job training constantly," Sister Dew said. "If we take all of the branches, wards and stakes currently organized in the Church in 170-plus nations, and start to add the number of women serving in bona fide leadership positions — who have the rights and responsibilities of presidency — it's several hundred thousand."

"Then you start thinking about all the mothers who have prepared their sons and daughters to serve missions, their children to be baptized, and all the Eagle Scouts — and we know who really earned that Eagle Scout...if you look at the influence of women, it's hundreds of thousands at any given moment."

Or, as she pointed out that President Gordon B. Hinckley told the National Press Club when asked what the Church does with its women, "We get out of their way and watch with wonder at all they are accomplishing."

"Successful organizations develop leaders. That's what an organization has to do," Sister Dew said. "That's what we're doing in a family: We're raising the next generation of leaders...and the most important leadership — the best — is inspired leadership given by those who are guided by the Holy Ghost."

"There is no way to limit or even measure a Latter-day woman of God with the influence of the Holy Ghost."

Sister Wendy Watson Nelson

Sister Nelson said she believes that women are "born to give birth and nurture relationships. We have a special ability, a propensity, an inclination, a strength in building and caring for relationships."

For example, she noted in 99% of her professional work helping individuals and families for 30 years, "it was always the women who were able to identify a problem and say there's something not quite right. We need some help. Let's go as a family. Let's go as a couple. I'll go myself."

Pursuing this, Sister Nelson said women have "spiritual gifts or unique abilities which help us nurture strong relationships."

She illustrated the first by telling a story of a doctor who sleeps through the night but his wife wakes immediately when their visiting grandkids need something, but she sleeps through his nighttime phone calls. "We hear and see those things we care and are responsible for," Sister Watson said.

"Righteous women who are focused and willing to fill the measure of their creation are willing to be different," she continued. "They're willing to be different."

Next, Sister Nelson urged women to "use your abilities to stand out. As women of God we were born to be different, not just different from men, but from women of the world." In fact, she added that there's a problem "if we start looking, acting and sounding like the women of the world. If there's no difference...there's a huge problem."

For example, she encouraged the women to not let their dress, speech or behavior "support the adversary," and be "really careful on the Internet."

Third, she noted that women have an "exquisite sensitivity of discernment" to perceive truth from error and perceive things of the spirit, and encouraged them to use it: "Be willing to listen to your spirit...when it tells you something is not quite right. Use your gifts of discernment. Trust yourself, and don't let other people talk you out of it."

"Use your abilities to be real: Speak the truth with clarity and kindness," she said. "Use your abilities to draw upon powers of heaven. Look to the one source who can give us strength."

Sisters Dew and Nelson also spoke earlier in the week during the BYU-Hawaii International Business Conference and also at a multi-stake fireside on November 16 in the Cannon Activities Center.

— Photos by Mike Foley